Asking. Working on Getting Good at It.

It's been a few years since I've read Amanda Palmer's The Art of Asking. I'm overdue for a reread. While I'm at it, I recall reading a related useful book called To Sell is Human by Dan Pink. Just to be sure, also adding that to my reread list.

Asking for what you want.

It's an important thing to work through, I know I'm not the only person dealing with getting better at it. Sales is important whether it's the transactional kind that gets your work into someone's hands or if it's the selling of ideas when people get to know you and your work.

I mentioned it's been a while since I read both Amanda Palmer's book and Dan Pink's book. It could be fuzziness of time and memory but I do see a strong theme connecting the two for me. Two messages that I feel I learned from them:

The Art of Asking: be willing to be your whole hearted and vulnerable self while asking for your audience to support you. You will grow as an artist by connecting in genuine human awkward, kind openness.

To Sell Is Human: you are serving your audience by being transparent, clear, and helpful about what you're doing and acknowledge the sales keep you in a situation to keep serving your audience. Let go of the negative images and stories about selling.

But I don't want to be a sales person.

Fair. But also worth digging into. What do you mean exactly by that person? No doubt there's folks who chose to be imposing, annoying, unkind, misuse their power, all that and more. The person who will shove a flyer in passersby hands only to have 9 of 10 to be dropped on the floor within 10 feet.

Yet do you really mean that stuff? What else is behind that reluctance?

All this talk about asking without actually asking.

I'm getting to it. I'm going to ask you something.

First ask is for your feedback: what do you get out of connecting with me and my work? Do you feel one way at the start and different after? Is there a particular item or few that stand out to you as why it's worth your time and attention?

As a reminder here's work I'm selling and sharing to consider:

• Workshops with downloadable video and PDFs about collaborative design, listening leadership, and creative challenges. Many are also at Skillshare.
• Games like Guitar Fretter, a playful action puzzle to learn the notes on the guitar fretboard.
• A book about learning to make games called Game Construction Kit.
• Merch with my designs on it like Bear and Turtle.
• Coaching sessions to help you past a creative or professional block or decision.
• Connect with me via this blog, it's my creative business studio where you get to see me put ideas to page. I have articles like this one about UX, this one about creative demons, plus a whole podcast that's an audio version of this blog: similar topics but separate articles.
• Join the fun at Lean Into Art, a podcast, community, and learning experiences to help visual and interactive storytellers keep learning and teaching.

Any of those that make you ready to fill in the blanks of "I like (blank) about (blank) " or "I wish (blank) had (blank) ". Feel free to send an email, contact form reply, comment. Any of those work great.

Even more awesome adding this to the first ask, send me note while you buy me a coffee. That's extra encouraging and I super appreciate it.

Second ask: please tell a friend you think would enjoy or find helpful what I'm up to. Not as a big public thing but as a text or an email message directly with them.

I don't need to know about your message. If you want to let me know you're sharing my stuff with friends someday when you see me at an event just give me a knowing look and a slow nod. Then I'll know.

Learning to get better at asking.

So many of us are great at advocating for others but less effective at our own advocacy. Let's all get better at asking and if you're already thinking about this, please share what is working for you. Useful mantras, ideas, links all welcome.